Ventilation.

 This blog has long been left unused, unvisited. 

And for that reason, it is the perfect place to vent out to the void of the internet. 

I have been happy for months now. Sure not perfectly happy, definitely not content. But happier than I had been through my years of college, my time working and earning, well, a lot compared to many. 

Not as fulfilled as the time I traveled and worked, nor as when I traveled to Europe and they published a comic of mine. 

But I have grown, I have become three times the writer and man I was before. 

I have learned a lot about myself on my own. 

From time to time I still yearn for affection and miss the companionship of a partner, both emotionally and sexually. But...

But I don't need it right now. I don't want it. 

And yet. 

I felt a gut punch today. Same kind of gut-wrenching feeling that I got back in Yuriria that day. 

I won't act on it. 

Whatever happened outside my sphere of self is not of my business. Whatever it is, they can deal with it on their own. 

I have my own desires, problems and life to live beyond whatever they are trying to drag me into.